Game: Temporal Orientation
Holben exhibits once again a profound mastery of acting as the GM and Ping acts as the medieval-knight-turned-time-agent Sir Peter. Hijinks ensue GAME 1 "So, Peter, first we're going to test your vortex manipulator. I've linked mine to yours so we'll go to the same place. Just operate it as we showed you." 2 I operate it as they've shown me (should I roll a die? If so, I roll a 6) 3 There is a roar and woosh of time as you are picked up and thrown into another time period. 6 is a perfect roll- you emerge nonchalantly in the Ice Age. "Very good. Just have to stay here for a short while as it recharges- keep asking questions." 4 "Methinks this place is hellishly cold. What people livest here?" 5 "Primitive people. Fire, axes and spears are all they have." Your guide sighs and looks around. "We're being watched." 6 "Tis true. Let us retire to a defensible position." What is the area? 7 You stand on a low, snow-covered hill. It is surrounded by forest. Shapes move in the trees. 8 A hill is defensible. I stay put, and call out "Friends! We hath ventured here from the distant future! Dost thou need assistance?" (By the way, what are my weapons stats?) 9 (Compact Laser Deluxe stats are on the 51st Century page: L, 50 (h) damage, 2 shots/turn, accuracy 1 in 2, range 40m. Long sword is M, Base+25 (sla).) "Your vortex manipulator incorporates a universal translator, so they should understand you. But they probably will think you mad." 10 "Even so, twould be prudent to communicate. If they be humans, which I am not sure of. Shall we explore the terrain?" 11 Your vortex manipulator beeps to tell you that it has recharged. "If you like." A Woolly Rhino walks into the clearing. 12 "My God, tis an ugly unicorn!" I walk into the forest, keeping a wary eye on the unicorn. Wooly Rhino, I mean. 13 The Woolly Rhino snorts at you and paws the ground with its front hooves. 14 "Twould be prudent to take our leave, methinks." I attemp to use the vortex manipulator, aiming for the Middle Ages and rolling a 4. 15 You have missed by one, arriving in the Renaissance. You stand at the centre of a bustling Italian marketplace. 16 "Tis vaguely familiar. Italy, methinks." I walk to the first somewhat well-dressed individual I can find and ask if anything "queer" has happened recently. 17 "Have you not heard? The Milanese are sending an army to attack us! And they bring with them indestructible soldiers!" The noble stares at you from his sedan chair. "Say... you're not from around here, are you?" 18 "Nay, I come forth from a far place. England, if thou must know. Pray tell me of these indestructible soldiers." 19 "Some say they come from the stars. Others say they have clambered up from hell. They wear armour too tough for any Earthly weapon to pierce, and their weaponry can kill five men with one flash." 20 "Couldst thou describe them for us? What do they call themselves?" 21 "No florentine has seen them speak. They stand like men, but men of steel." 22 we would be honored to help thee, sire. Give us a troop of thy finest men and we shalt destroy these abombinations." 23 "Well... he scratches his head angrily. "Very well. I shall send my Swiss guards to accompany you. Your friend there is acting oddly." Your guide is playing around with a plasma cannon, which he promptly hides. "Don't worry about me." 24 "Tis not wise to play with such weapons. I once smote myself with such a thing." I turn to the noble. "Where be our enemies? We shall set off at once." 25 "You will be able to see the fires of their camp but a dozen leagues from the edge of our city." 26 Are the Swiss Guards with me yet? If so, I set out for the edge of Florence. 27 They are indeed. You see the Milanese campfires on the horizon. 28 Don't suppose I could go back 100 years, plant a bomb in that exact spot, and put a 100 year timer on it? :P How many Swiss Guards do I have with me? I sneak cautiously towards the encampment. 29 :P 20 Guards. Your sneaking goes unnoticed. 30 "Stay behind. If I give thee a signal, come down and aide me. I sneak into the encampment, and peak into a tent. 31 Inside the tent are three crossbowmen, arguing loudly. Their weapons lie by the entrance. 32 I listen to their argument. 33 "We can't trust them! Giovanni went into their tent yesterday. He never came back." "He deserved whatever he got. No, they're our best chance of gaining dominion over Italy. And even if they did rise up, we know exactly how to stop them." "And if that fails?" "It can't fail." "I still think that they're..." 34 I burst into the tent. Dual-wielding... I stab one in the chest with my Long Sword, rolling a 2, and I fire at another one, rolling a 5 and a 4. I place my sword tip on the survivors throat (he's the one who didn't trust them.) "If thou seeketh life, thou wilt tell me all thou knowest about thy newfound allies." 35 His eyes grow extremely wide and he falls back onto the floor. "Don't kill me! I'll tell you everything I know! They are like men, but made from steel, and they can kill you with a touch or by using strange fire from their wrists!" 36 I smile as menacingly as I can manage. "Pray take me to their tent." 37 Terrified, he leads you to the massive central tent. On entering, you see six large metal pods, evidently designed for humans to enter. A cyberman turns to you. 38 "Stand thee back, tin man. I am Sir Peter of the Time Agency. Explain thy purpose for being in this time, lest I bring the full wrath of eternity upon thee." Behind my back I prepare my Vortex Manipulator, just in case. 39 "You have designated yourself "Time Agent". You will be upgraded and your technology shall be used to assist in the upgrading of the universe." It reaches out to grab you, but then it is blown to small pieces by a plasma cannon. Two more cybermen march in. 40 I kick one into the other and start running away in a zig-zag motion. I yell for my allies. 41 The Swiss guards mob them, pushing the Cybermen to the ground and jabbing them enough with their halberds to kill them. Meanwhile, a plasma cannon is fired repeatedly until to upgrading chamber is left standing. "Good work." The guide smiles. "Now just for..." Your void manipulator, and then his begins to glow gold. "Oh. Crap." 42 "Wilt thou tell me what it is doing, or shalt thou simply stand there repeating vulgar words as a peasant?" 43 "That wasn't even a word in the middle ages." He scowls. "Something extremely bad has just happened and time is rushing around crazily. Vortex manipulators won't work until it's calmed down... and by then, the vortex will probably be full of Daleks." 44 "Daleks... a man called the Doctor mentioned them once, methinks. What are they? Allies, mayhaps?" 45 The Guide actually looks frightened. "Nothing could be further from the truth." He locks and loads the plasma cannon. "Hopefully the Agency will send a ship to pick us up. Otherwise, I can't imagine us getting out of here alive." The alarm is shouted outside, and you hear soldiers running towards where you are. 46 I prepare my weapons. "We shalt battle our way into the surrounding countryside, and then disguise ourselves as hermits until the Vortex becomes safe again." 47 "If it ever d..." His vortex manipulator blinks. "A message." He plays it. "This is the Time Agency High Command. Code blood red. I repeat; code blood red. All agents disband. Draw no attention to yourself. Do not attempt to time travel. Await further instructions." "Blood red. The Agency believes that it is going to be destroyed in the next few minutes." The Guide sighs, and then presses a different button. There is a blue flash as you reappear just outside the camp. "Teleporting is probably attention-attracting, but who cares." 48 Sir Peter utters a few period-specific swear words. "What do we do now? Shalt we employ my brilliant hermit plan...?" 49 "Alright. It might kill some time. No pun intended." 50 I spend two years as a hermit...? 51 Barely an hour into the hermitry, a new message is received. "Attention all Time Agents. HQ has been destroyed. High Command has been destroyed. Emergency protocol 417 carried out successfully- new high command established. Please convene at unintelligible in three meta-minutes." "That's our ticket out of here." 52 Aww... I was looking forward to eating locusts and wild honey. :P "Twould indeed- if we could understand where to convene." 53 "That was deliberate- we all know exactly where to convene. We're going to go and beg the Time Lords for assistance." 54 I sigh. "I hate begging. Let us be off." 55 There is a flash, and you are all on board the Time Agency's new HQ- a Timecraft Carrier located somewhere between the vortex and space. It edges slowly towards Gallifrey. "Guide! Take the novice to the lower decks." "He should be fine." "...alright. But don't let him say anything." 56 I start to protest, but then I wise up and try to avoid too much notice. 57 The screen flips into existence and a stern face appears. The owner of the face is wearing a crimson robe, and bears a strange gauntlet on one hand. "Have you come to beg, little humans?" He spits. "We humbly ask that you provide sanctuary for us until the vortex becomes traversable once more..." "And why should I do that?" "We can... we can help you." "Not how you believe you can. But I may have a task for you." "...anything." "Go out and find the warrior known as the Doctor. He is needed. Then, I may listen to your pleading." 58 "It shalt be done, sire. I hath encountered the Doctor before; before we departed, he said he would venture unto the Cretaceous in search of a man called 'Robin Hood'. Know this, sire: we shall not return until we hath found him and returned with him at hand!" 59 Rassilon looks at you contemptuously and then closes the channel. "Alright. Guide, can you handle this?" The Guide nods. "Peter, you seem keen to come. Make sure to get kitted up in the armoury before we head out." (Feel free to take one item of General Equipment and one item of 51st Century technology for no fee at this point) 60 I take a laser screwdriver and a particle gun, if that's OK with thee. 61 Wise choices. "We're taking a Chula warship, for the accuracy. Robin Hood, you said? Off we go." The ship shoots off into the vortex, with the pair of you in it. 62 What am I supposed to do? I wait for us to arrive. 63 You could talk :P You arrive over Sherwood forest, and a herd of deer flee as you land. The turrets of Nottingham are visible in the distance, and the forest road is a few hundred yards to the west. 64 I head towards Nottingham. 65 As you approach, you find a trail of armoured corpses, which seem to have been cooked alive. 66 I foolishly follow the trail. 67 You reach the castle gate, which has been smashed open through the battlements above it. Smoke pours out from inside. A group of peasants are trying to douse the flame. 68 "Peasants! I am Sir Peter, high-born knight of Burgonshire. Pray tell me the history of this wreckage." 69 "A dragon happened." The peasant wipes his dirty nose on his dirty sleeve. 70 "As I expected, peasant." I enter the castle. 71 He makes a rude sign at you behind your back. Once you enter, a group of men-at-arms stop you, looking particularly scared and with damaged weapons and armour. "Who are you? Why are you here?" 72 "I am Sir Peter, high-born knight of Burgonshire. I hath journied here to speak with the Earl of Locksley, who is an old friend of mine. Mayhaps he hath spoken of my courage and selfless heroism...?" 73 "Ah! Sir Robert has taken charge of Nottingham since the death of the Sheriff. You should be able to find him in the keep." 74 "Thank thee, good sir." I head to the keep. 75 A familiar figure comes down the steps to greet you. "Sir Peter! I was hoping we would meet again." He shakes you hand warmly. He seems to have washed. A figure in a suit and bow tie fiddles with some glowing contraption behind him, then looks up. "Oh! Hello again! I'm the Doctor, remember?" 76 I greet Robin Hood warmly, and then turn to the Doctor. "Well I remeber thee. Thou art the knave that strandest Blist and I at the Time Agency HQ! There is now a disturbance of some sort, and beings called Daleks render the Vortex unsafe to traverse. The Time Lords demand thy aide in these matters!" 77 His face darkens. "Well you can tell them that I... am... not... coming." Roll two dice and try to persuade him! 78 (What? You can't make the Doctor do stuff by rolling dice. I'll talk to him.) "Whyever not, Doctor? Thou art needed! Tis thy duty to respond to this cry for help!" 79 He looks straight at you, head angled down so that there is a definite shadow over his eyes. "I did it once before. I am not doing it again." You are not going to persuade him with ideas such as duty or loyalty. 80 "But if thou dost not, trillions will die! Art thou too much of a coward to do what must be done?" 81 "You're right. I have to do something to stop them. But that is not joining the fight- that is ending the fight. Every Time Lord, every nameless thing, every stinking Dalek must die so that the universe can live." 82 "Then do it!" 83 "Alright!" He marches back inside the keep. A few moments later, his head pops back out. "I'll... need a demat gun." 84 "I hath no demat gun, good Sir Doctor. Would thou be contented with a particle gun? Mayhaps a long sword would aide the..?" 85 "No no no. No substitutes are acceptable. The de-mat gun must have been used to breach the Time Lock, so if we can find the fault point, we should be able to follow the ardinomine signal back to its source.... hold right there!" The Doctor runs back in, and then the TARDIS materialises beside you. The doors swing open. "Here we go! Let's track that... oh..." The Doctor looks crestfallen. 86 "What is it now? What keeps s from our goal?" 87 "The signal doesn't lead anywhere. It goes... out of the universe. There's only... there's only one place it could be coming from." 88 "And where is that? Some form of horrific zone of death, I should imagine." 89 The Doctor looks up at you bemusedly. "Someone's genre savvy." He looks back down. "Aaaand... we have no way to get there." 90 "Surely there is some way to journey there? The Time Lords seem powerful; mayhaps they would aide us, not knowing our true intent?" 91 "The Time Lords would send me to the front lines as soon as they knew where I was. We cannot rely on them for anything." He sits down on the steps, thinking. 92 "Then what? Is time doomed?" 93 "Not quite." He turns to the Guide. "You there!" "Yeah?" "Can you get us to the year 1983, November the 15th?" "Sure, but can't your TAR-" "Not this time." He grins. "The old timeline, with my previous selves, is gone. But the membrane between the two is weak. If we supply enough power... we can break through! We can't do anything much, but we'll have enough time to enter the Time Scoop Borusa sent to pick the previous versions of me up and move them to the Death Zone. We won't be sent to the meta-time that the Time Scoop leads to, but the meta-current time in the Death Zone! Ha!" The Guide scratches his head. "I'm not sure how that-" The Doctor points his sonic screwdriver into the sky and the Guide's timeship flies up overhead. It picks up the TARDIS and then the three of you with its tractor beam, and then shoots off into the vortex. "Now to use the temporal microfracture density amplification in order to project a re-establishment of higher chronons throughout the vorous network and get things moved!" The ship shakes from side to side wildly, and looking out the window you see it emerging above the countryside. It shoots straight into a hovering, shining thing, and then the outside goes dark. ---- THE DEATH ZONE 94 The warship lands, its outside emitting large quantities of smoke. The TARDIS is dropped from its underside, and then so are you. There is an enormous, empty desert, broken by tall cliffs and strange obelisks. Lightning flashes on the horizon. 95 I touch a strange obelisk. "Is this a demat gun...?" 96 "That is just a tall pillar made from stone. The demat gun will look like..." He chews his teeth for a few moments. "...you'll know it when you see it." 97 "Lets us look for it, then." I walk towards the horizon. 98 Something like a giant worm, fifty metres or so long, rises up and then sinks back down into the sand about thirty yards from you. "A drashig. Watch your step." Metal stingrays swoop through the sky. 99 "What manner of place is this?" (i. e, gimmee a link :P) 100 "This is the Death Zone, a place outside of time and space used by the Time Lords as an arena during times past. When it was abandoned... things... took up residence here instead. Nothing should ever come here." 101 "Methinks the Time Lords are barbaric creatures that should be destroyed." I search for the demat gun- probably irrelevant, but I roll a 2. 102 The Doctor sighs. "It won't be here. It will be in the most awkward place possible, with the greatest number of slavering beasts and monsters around it. Probably near Rassilon's Tower." He points at a colossal black tower on the horizon. 103 I head for Rassilon's Tower. 104 As you enter a valley, three Cybermen block your path. "Halt. Emergency upgrading needed. Submit for upgrading." 105 Dual-wielding particle gun and compact laser deluxe... 6 and 4. After armor, that's 125 damage to one Cyberman. With my superb knight reflexes, I rush back outside and hide behind a stone obelisk. 106 Particle gun does 200 (ex)- Cyberman have no ex save. The Guide's plasma cannon takes care of the others. "Alright." The Doctor waves his screwdriver around. "I'm detecting Selachian weaponry." Sure enough, a Selachian stomps into view. 107 Stupid shark derivative. I roll a 5 with my particle gun. Sushi time. 108 "Well, that was easy." The Doctor peers at the remains. "Stuff to do!" He hurries off towards the Tower, with both of you in tow. You observe many battles going on in the distance- some species are familiar, and others not. A dragon fights a stingray-creature up above. "Things get weirder as we near the tower. We start meeting things like... well, like that." He jabs the Fendahleen corpse with his screwdriver. 109 Category:Games